Let’s talk about Wuthering Heights

Let me be clear about something before I get into this post: I am a hopeless romantic – I love love stories, in any medium. From songs, books, musicals, movies, or television shows.

I am emotionally attached to Ted & Robin, Heathcliff & Catherine, Meredith & Derek, Aragon & Arwen, Elphaba & Fiyero, Han & Leia, Tony & Ziva, Elizabeth & Mr. Darcy, and Harry & Hermione (yes, I know they didn’t end up together but THEY SHOULD HAVE – fight me on it).

Those love stories get me every single time. How could they not?

“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same…”, stealing blue french horns from restaurants, “Couldn’t live without you, I guess…”, and elevator proposals that lead to marriage vows written on sticky notes are all things that have roped me into one love story or another. It just happens.

I accepted the fact that I’m a hopeless romantic a long time ago.

But recently, I have come across a bit of an issue with the love stories that I adore so much. You see, they’re all flawed – some more than others (looking at you Heathcliff & Catherine), but there are always glaring issues that don’t go away just because two people love each other.

I am not trying to be cynical here, not at all.

You see, humans suck at relationships. According to the American Psychological Association, 40-50% of marriages end in divorce in the United States. That percentage increases among those who get remarried after divorcing the first time.

Those statistics should absolutely break your heart – they break mine. It makes me ask the question, what goes wrong? Why do these people let go of their spouse? What happened to fighting for a lasting marriage?

My parents have been married for twenty-eight years, and I am so proud of them for that. They are absolutely fantastic. Their relationship inspires and encourages me. As a young adult, I know now that my parent’s marriage is not always easy. I know they have had conflict and stress and that the Devil has tried his best to ruin them in many ways. But, praise God, my parents both love Jesus more than they love each other.

I am convinced that is the crux of the problem with love stories and human relationships.

I am not saying that Jesus is like a magic button that automatically fixes everything, just that we can’t love anyone well without knowing and loving and actively pursuing the Author of Life.

Think about it; how are we supposed to love one person until death do us part if we don’t even know the love of the Father who loves us so much He sent His Son to die for us (Romans 5:8)?

The world we live in is broken – humanity is broken. And because of that, we will fail, especially at loving people, without Jesus and only Jesus.

Jesus is the perfect manifestation (literally) of love. God is love.

All of this to say, that no matter how great a love story looks or reads or sounds in books, movies, and television shows, the only love story that should really matter is penned down in the Bible. That’s the one that should impact our every thought, word, and action.

Corinthians 13 is read at weddings on a regular basis – and don’t misunderstand me, it is a wonderful, powerful piece of Scripture – but most people never read the rest of the Bible, or spend time getting to know the Savior that Paul was writing about.

If we are not absolutely focused on pursuing God over any other person or goal, we cannot fully love others the way we are meant to.

If there is one thing that I have learned from my parents about marriage and relationships it is that God should be in the center of it all, and I am so thankful for that lesson.

On another note, Tony and Ziva deserved better. And Hermione should have ended up with Harry. If I could insert the shoulder shrugging emoji here, I would.

*Disclaimer: following Jesus does not make someone perfect, but it will change your life. Also, yes, mom & dad, that is a picture of you two as the thumbnail – remember I love you both, hah.